A Cavalcade of Fake Stars on The Ticket

My count is up to 36 and I’m still working on it. God bless Gordon Keith and George Dunham.

1. Randy Cody the Contractor (my favorite)

2. Fake Tiger Woods
3. Dylan the argumentative teen
4. Ed Carter and his sports hotline
5. Fake Jerry Jones
6. Fake Jason Garrett
7. Chris Chris from Sales
8. Dr. Carleton Maxwell
9. Fake Mack Brown
10. Fake Michael Irvin, featuring school closings
11. Trapper John, M.D.
12. Marge Schimdittler — George Dunham’s high school swimming coach
13. Fake Jerry Jones, Jr. and/or Stephen Jones
14. Roosevelt (Jerry Jones’s right-hand gopher)
15. Fake Donald Trump
16. Mush Mouth Thomas
17. Ribby Paultz — sports expert
18. Spaulding (Jerry Jones’s grandson – college student, University of Arkansas)
19. Jimmy Amangiola of the Touchdown Brothers, Sports talk guys from Philadelphia
20. Fake Norm Hitzges
21. Fake Nolan Ryan
22. Fake Mark Cuban
23. Fake Chan Gailey – football coach
24. Fake George W. Bush
25. Fake Michelle Wie
26. Shorty Defazio (sounds a lot like Ribby Paultz)
27. Fake Charlotte Jones
28. Various fake animals (winner of Kentucky Derby, winner of
Westminster Dog Show)
29. The Ticket Mouse
30. Fake Tony Romo

31. Deep Throat Informant (sounds like the Ticket Mouse with distortion)

32. Sports Panties

33. Dirty Doug Out (old baseball player who sounds like McGruff the crime-fighting dog)

34. Clarence Murphy, maintenance man